Visit South Dakota, Not Many Coronavirus Cases — Make D.J.T. Happy!
Very soon we may be able to travel & relax as Donald Trump allows us to visit cities, towns or states where the COVID-19 pandemic is not widespread.
America’s coronavirus task team led by straight-talking, no nonsense Vice-President Pence has informed us that because of the leadership of our great President, at this true American hero’s command, we will soon take decisive action based on our G-d fearing national leader’s superior handling of this pandemic.
In fact, President Trump, clearly a deeply religious and introspective individual stated,
“Easter’s a very special day for me.” Wouldn’t it be great to have all the churches full? You’ll have packed churches all over our country … I think it’ll be a beautiful time.”
Kudo’s to our germophobic leader who clearly has our best interests at heart. Never before in history have we been lucky enough to have a U.S. President who cares so deeply about us all.
Of course, it’s to be expected that the leader of the free world wants to ensure the well-being and particularly mental health of our citizens.
Clearly deep study, collaboration with mental health experts and possibly FOX News’s Sean Hannity dribbling in his ear informed him to make the following statement.
“You’re going to lose more people by putting a country into a massive recession or depression.” “You’re going to lose people. You’re going to have suicides by the thousands.”
“I’m talking about where people suffer massive depression, where people commit suicide, where tremendous death happens… I mean, definitely would be in far greater numbers than the numbers that we’re talking about with regard to the virus.”
Isn’t it great during this period of national crisis we have a leader on whom we can count to make measured decisions?
As Vice-President Mike Pence might have said… We can bless our lucky stars we have a President… a natural born leader… a man who has taken the reigns of the Presidency and who through his greatness, sheer strength of will, and commitment to our great nation will shortly oversee the end of this pandemic.
Indeed, as the President has made very clear:
“Our country wasn’t built to be shut down… We’re not going to let the cure be worse than the problem. At the end of the 15-day period, we’ll make a decision as to which way we want to go…”
Folks, I didn’t pick South Dakota out of thin air. As you can tell by the great reflection the writing of this article demonstrates I chose the state for a reason. At the date of this writing South Dakota is blessed to have only 46 reported cases of COVID-19. Please note: Positive test results are no longer required to be sent to the CDC for confirmation.
Most importantly South Dakota offers phenomenal residency benefits. All you have to do is stay one night at a motel and sign up with a mail forwarding service and then all this is yours:
No state income tax
No state income tax on Social Security income
No personal property tax
No pension tax
4% excise tax on net purchase of vehicles and RVs
Low vehicle insurance rates
No state inheritance tax
No intangible tax on investments
Low vehicle license fees
No annual vehicle inspection requirements
Here’s an extra bonus if you won’t leave home without your weapon of choice, Any valid resident or nonresident permit from another state is valid in South Dakota according to the terms of the issuing state, as long as the South Dakota laws and rules are complied with (SDCL 23–7–7.4).
It all sounds like a pretty good deal to me. Of course, I’m a bit concerned that the most well-trained and experienced medical people in our country take a different view on near-term travel.
“But public health experts warned that there needed to be a nationwide approach to fighting the spread of a virus that could easily move around the country just as it has done around the globe. And many expressed horror at the idea of pulling back on mitigation efforts too early.”
Heck, this is America, the land of the free. And we’re so lucky to have a concerned President looking after all of us, tall and small, rich and poor and white and well… I’m not quite sure.
My thanks to all readers who voted for Donald J. Trump. You have surely helped shape the science & medicine denying history of our great country for years to come.
Your grandchildren, great grandchildren and their offspring will fondly remember you and all who passed from COVID-19 as they spend their riches while gasping for breath and using divining rods to find potable water!
That is of course, unless denying climate change forced America to seek out another universe where regressives, reactionaries, conservatives and all those concerned only about the Dow Jones Industrial Average would find new vistas and opportunity to despoil and destroy.
The only way we will get through these trying times is by acknowledging we are all part of the family of man and must work together harmoniously as we fight to bring this pandemic to an end! By helping others we help ourselves. Carpe Diem!
South Dakotans, I mean no disrespect to your beautiful state. I chose it only because at the moment you are lucky enough to have so few cases of COVID-19.
HERE’S A LINK TO THE TOURISM GUIDE FOR SOUTH DAKOTA. It’s truly a great place to visit!
FOR THE MOST UP-TO-DATE INFORMATION ON THE CRISIS FACING US ALL VISIT THE CENTERS FOR DISEASE CONTROL WEBSITE.
Photo: DonkeyHotey / CC BY (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)